reopen my diary :')

i was thinking to open my diary and read it from the beginning...while i was reading, i found some of my special day.. there are 13th Dec and 20th July... hmmm however, each day has a different feeling.. feeling that teach me how to be mature woman and feeling which introduce me to feel how to loved and love...

:') please stay...

karena gw takut kalo gw bakal kehilangan lu :'  , so will you wait for me until we understand why, how, and what love is...?

******** :)

finally, i met you... i really want to say that 'i really miss you'.. but i know i can't cos the situation isn't allowed me to say so..

but its okay ;) i think you should already know about it... :P

thankyou :')

to the MAX!

Gw capeee to the max meen! belakangan ini gw tidur bener bener gw akuin kek kebooo...aarrrghhh

Dan disela-sela gw istirahat, gak sengaja gw liat 'benda' itu.. sesaat gw diam dan hanya bisa bertanya dalam hati gw "bersediakah dia?"

Feel quite happy :)

19 oktober 2011

puncaaaak!! yeeey xD

gw cape banget hri ini (~" =.=)~ *leyeleye* ...hmmm skrng gw lgi duduk" ditangga liat langit...dan gw gak nyangka klo dipuncak, bintangnyaa banyaak :) walopun gak smuanya menyala...

kepala gw muter" krna gw pengen liat seberapa banyak bintang yg ada disekeliling gw...

Temen gw klo udah ngeliat gw muter" pasti bakal sewooot..hahaha dan mereka biasanya bilang "indah si klo banyak bintang, tpi gak sampe sestress lu si son" 

lol...

Hmmmm *sigh* liat langit klo ada bintangnya gak akan membuat gw stress kok, yg ada mereka mengingatkan gw dengan kenangan" indah yg pernah gw alami.. :)

just wondering..

hmmm, suddenly something appeared in my mind just a minutes ago.. 

I just wondering, how is the night sky out there? 

is it full of stars?

is it beautiful?

and is the sky can make our feeling better?

And if there is a night sky which fulfill that criteria, would you tell me, where i could see that?

i'm just a fool :'(

maafin gw..gw udah buat lu menunggu jawaban gw lama banget..tapi gw belum menemukan waktu yang tepat untuk mengatakan segalanya kpada lu...hmmmfh 

hari ini, gw seneng bisa liat lu pada akhirnya :) walopun hanya beberapa detik..seenggaknya gw tau gimana lu skrng..tapi gw juga merasa gw sangat dodol, krna gw membiarkan lu pergi begitu saja.. :'( hmmmm

31 days

It is already 31 days since the last time i saw him.. hmmmm ( .__.)

Initially I was not accustomed to not seeing him..cos usually, i always saw him everyday.. but it is all change now.. 

Even so, i still want to wait to see him...although i know, i might just be standing and staring at him like a fool, waiting for what the reaction would he give me?

Untitled

It's like he doesn't hear a word I say, his mind is somewhere far away and I don't know how to get there. It's like all he wants is to chill out, he makes me wanna pull all my hair out. Like he doesn't even care..

Will you promise me to be faithful?

Not Available

never stop

Gw sibuuuuuuukkk bangeeet x( duuuuh tugas tuh numpuk deadlinenya dibulan November! Dan sedangkan otak gw ini butuh relax skiranya sebulan! huehuehue.... 

And i always think bout him while i was preparing my project..i dont know why.. itu selalu membuat gw berpikir kalo gw hrus belajar fokus...it is hard but i just thought that i have to.. 

But when i asked myself why i always think bout him, i relized that i want to see his face? his smile..

Trust

I believe, all of people in this world want to be together with someone they love..so do I...

But sometimes, how much you love someone, there will be times that someone you love seems doesn't care.. and most of people who have this problem usually they have a misunderstanding..

And honestly, i have a similiar problem i think... But i have to understand because i don't know what the exactly is going on.. 

But all i know is, he loves me..although i don't know how much he loved me..

mix feelin'

is it good if someone has a mix feeling? for me, it depends..

Mix feeling just make me an abstract feeling that make me confuse.. :(

NOOOOOOOOO!!!

:'( this afternoon my mom said that she planned to sell my house.. when i heard that, i thought it was okay cos i knew that we will move to perbun..BUT my mom continued, "we will move to puri kencana!" 

AARRGHHH to be honest, i prefer to live here rather than PK....ouuufghh, cos i already 'pw' here..

cos i have many friends here and its easy to go somewhere,

and the important one is, i have so many many memories in this house..SO MANY.. :(

Huufgghhh, i wish >.< 

i wish my mom's plan will never happened, pleaseeee (>.<)!

just thought, 'how cruel i am? :( ' but honestly, its very hard to leave my house...

i dont wanna cry :'(

Someone seems likes you .. I'm just guessing and not sure but it looks like it .. 

 

to be honest, I'm afraid.  

She's my friend and She's very kind.. I dont want to hurt her because she looks plain.  

but, on the other hand I'm afraid of losing you :'(

i have to FIGHT!

Menjalankan hidup gw yang skarang bisa dibilang gak gampang.. Hidup gw yg skrng adalah hidup dmna gw harus diproses menuju ke kedewasaan..Banyak banget kegiatan yg gw ikutin, dan dri setiap kegiatan ada komitmen yg hrus gw jalankan..

Di sisi lain gw juga harus sekolah, belon lagi sekolah gw tuh numpuk tugas! ulangan jugaa berentet nunggu dpan gerbang gw..ckkck = = DAN gua juga harus rajin" spya nilai gw bisa bagus spya bisa masuk IPA..duuuh! stress keknya ya klo diliat? memaang! DAN LAGI, libur lebaran bgini, banyak tugas yg hrus gw lakukan slah stunya PR MAT yg nomernya ada 50 nomer LEBIH...ampun" dah.. gw juga ikut yg nmnya kegiatan OSIS, dan jujur aja gw pengen banget bsa dipilih wakil ketua osis suatu saat nnti tpi si jgn skrng ya soalnya gw masi gaktau apa" soal kegiatan SMA gw ini.. sebenernya gw kepinginnya jadi ketua, tpi gw melihat kondisi gw yg padet mnjdi wakil gw sudah sangat bersyukuur... hehehe

Awalnya gw putus asa, krna takut gw gakbkal bisa nyelesein SEMUAA ITUU..ARGH...OYAAH! gw juga mmpunyai masalah pribadi dan kluarga yg HARUS gw selesaikaan... ):

Tapi gw bersyukuur banget, dengan adanya firman Tuhan pda sore hari ini, gw dikuatkan :) dan firmannya PAS bangeet...gw pengen terimakasih ma Tuhan krna Dia menghibur gw disaat gw stress! hahahha
Firman itu mengatakan "Jika kamu BERTAHAN sampai akhirnya kamu akan selamat" hmm, ya kira" seperti ituudee... kata kuncinya adalah bertahan, gw hrus peraang sama smua beban ituu, dan gw malah hrus bersyukur ma Tuhan udah ngasih itu semua, krna Tuhan kasi gw LATIHAN spya gw bisa trus diproses menjadi anak yg bijaksana, dan gw bsa menghasilkan buah yg banyak :)

a half story of mine

HOAAAM, malem-malem gini enakkan sih tiduur tapi gw lebih memilih melek spertinyaa :( karena mata gw tidak mau disuruh menutuup...hehehe
Hmm, okeeey gw mau cerita-cerita aja tentaang 'gw' sbenernyaa...

Gw sebenernya dilahirkan dengan 2 tipe nama yang berbeda...jadi, bokap gw pengen nama gw 'sonia' sedangkan nyokap gw pengen nma gw itu 'sonya'...hhha yaaap, emang gak beda jauuh tpi itu sbnrnya juga sangat berpengaruuh, krna klo nama gw akirnya 'sonia' gw gak perlu dipanggil nyaaak! lgii....hahaha
Yaaaah tpi apa boleh buaat, Tuhan menghendaki gw untuk dipanggil 'nyak' ckckck...
walopun bgtu, gw suka bangeet sama nama gw itu :)

Dan yg kedua, gw adalaah anak yg sangaat cengeng...hmm, gw si gak bangga ya tpi itulah faktaa. jujur susah dijelaskan tpi mudah dipraktekkan :) hehhee

Dan yg ketiga, hal yang paling gw benciii dalam hidup gw adalaah, ketika gw harus mendengarkaan bonyok gw bertengkar, dan gakbisa memberikan pengertian yang baiik kpda mereka, walopun gw sudah berusahaa :'(
Jujur aja, gw bersyukur dengan masalah yg ada disekitar gw..krna dri masalah masalah itu gw belajar..
ada satu temen gw crta tntng mslah hidupnya, dan dia blng klo hidup dia itu sial bgt gak kek gw yg tentram tanpa ada mslah..tpi gw kasitau ke dia, maslah dia tuh masih lbih kecil dbnding mslah yg gw adepin slama bertaun" ..tapi gw bljr dri masalah itu, krna gw tau suatu hari nnti itu bakal jdi bekal hidup gw :)

so memorable

Gw kangeeeen banget sama 9.3 :'( ..do u all still remember this?

And also our last meeting??

Gw kangeen banget sama kelas tercinta gw yg satu ini :( kelas 9.3 

Gw cuma mo bilang ke kaliaan klo kaliaan tuh hebat bangeet! dan thankyouu ya buat kenangan kenangaan indaah nyaa yg sampe skrng gak pernah gw lupaiin itu :') and don't forget each other, also keep in touch yaaa :) 

i hope we can still in touch forevaaaaa!! :DD

i'm afraid

Something make me worry everyday... : '
It is cos im afraid :'( afraid of something...important for me...

Harii yg aneeeh - -''

Harii iniii tuh aneeeh de! suaraa gw jadii makin nge-bass dibanding kemareen...trus, tadii gw merasakaan kepala gw puyeng" tanpa sebab..Dan, napsu makan gw hari ini juga menuruun drastiss! trus skrng, internet gw rada" eror gtu, gakbisa buka ini dan ituuu, tapi anehnyaa fb, twitter, dan blogger masii bisa dibukaa lo :o ckckckk

sunggguh aneeeeeeh...kenapa ya hari ini aneeh? hhhhhfffffhhhhhhh

Terus, besok gw kesekola buat ikut upacaraa doang, tpi udah gtu gw berencana nntn harpoot aah! tapii gak ada satupun temen gw yg mo nemeniin :'(  karena semuanyaaa sudah nntn film itu...tapi yasudahlaah ;) mau diapakan lgiii?